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Curl 4 - I'm intense because...

     In my previous blog I promised I'd share more of my story. Some of you asked why I'm so intense in my writing. Hope this makes sense. I'm still trying to make sense of all of this. In all honesty, I know nothing. I'm just a willing vessel at this point in my life.      What's the worst thing that has happened to you or someone you know that initiated a transformation in your life? Do you remember when you made a decision to change? Do you remember how it made you feel?     For me, my worst thing was my best thing. The end.  The end of me. Where I just got comfortable. The end of a new friend i just met and wished we got to be friends longer.  The end of a milestone.  The end of an old friend I thought I could help. An end. Any end.        It always hurt. Like my heart is bleeding and no one can see it; hurt. Sometimes its gushing, sometimes it's dripping. Nevertheless it's bleeding. Like I'm alone and this i...
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Curl 3 - Living in Love

In this season of 2020.... PAuse. I came across this verse and my thoughts started curling.... " They left that place and passed through Galilee. Jesus did not want anyone to know where they were, because he was teaching his disciples . He said to them, “ The Son of Man is going to be delivered into the hands of men. They will kill him, and after three days he will rise.”  But they did not understand what he meant and were afraid to ask him about it." Mark 9:30‭-‬32 NIV Jesus loved His disciples so much that he told them the truth gracefully in private even if it hurt and whether they understood or not. Yet the love was was impossible to reciprocate for the disciples back to Him. We expect others to love, care, express themselves to us the way Jesus does through private intimacy, but the truth is, we, ourselves, love one another the way the disciples do- Afraid. Afraid of returning intimacy. We refuse to ask questions and take statements as they are, misunderstanding them an...
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Curl 2 - Hate vs. Love

I have a question if you dont mind me asking...  Do you believe that someone based on their affiliations/associations are "hating" maliciously and consciously or subconsciously? Feel free to leave your comments and responses below. Not to argue. I want to hear you. In my humble opinion, many people I look up to don't have many intimate friends that don't look or act like them... does that make him a hater or just not intentional about his/her circle? Some people just haven't made time to be intentional. Some people are just afraid, annoyed or prefer to be alone. That's all okay really. Because that's what makes us unique. No 2 people are truly alike as much as we're all not that different.   This season of 2020, I've been proud of some of my friends who have chosen to take into action the change necessary for a better future instead of sharing statements on social media to prove a stance. I'm loving the stories of strangers meeting in public pl...
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Curl 1 - Thanks Anxiety!

      Early in the morning around 2am (6/18) I was having a Mini breakdown in my brain like a cloudy anxiety attack because of social media- reading, hearing, feeling the opinions presented by friends and acquaintances. I saw how ignorant people can be on many topics. I can see how it was getting to me and all God said in that moment was "this world is so broken". It's covered in sin but that His grace is sufficient to sustain even us ignorant believers from perishing... He forgives us constantly for we know not what we do. He lets us duke it out like kids. His breath is Glory and life... He ain't here to explain what He already said. HE SAID WHAT HE SAID AND HE MEANT IT. Point Blank Period.  And all of His creation can try and justify all they want. He's the only justification. He is the way. The truth. And the Life. No man can come to the Father, explain the Father, explain His ways, know the All in All but through Christ.      As His child. I need t...
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